“I need help!!!! I want to be a good Christian but can’t get thoughts out of my head. They are literally making me sick!

Well I have just been questioning him! A LOT! I’m willing to admit that. I will never quit praying and have a feeling in my heart God is in there. I’m just questioning Jesus a little bit. I was trying to defend my faith yesterday and just could not. It kind of made things worse. I’m just looking for answers for my desire is to believe. I’ve also been having bad thoughts about demons which I want to go away. I keep on praying and I’m sure things will be answered.

And it’s starting to make me wonder if I am a Christian and if Jesus is really the son of god. Like I said I keep on praying and will never give up.”

Does it matter whether Jesus was the Son of God? Question is… “Does He have anything useful to say about your life?” The teachings of Jesus are like riddles. The point is to discover for yourself their true meaning. They are vague, obscure; they resound in the heart, appeal to the heart but confuse the mind. The riddles are devices used by the master Jesus to awaken us. They are very ingenious in that you see them, according to your own level of awareness…

The opening of the Gospel of Thomas says “These are the secret sayings that the living Jesus spoke and Didymos Judas Thomas recorded. 1. And he said, ‘Whoever discovers the interpretation of these sayings will not taste death.’”

We are to discover their true meaning. To KNOW with full clarity and insight what they fully mean is to understand as Jesus understands, to see the truth as He sees it. He wants you to “follow him.”

The truth to which Jesus most often points is to the simple presence of being and non-attachment… “Become like a child.” “Blessed are the poor in spirit.” “Seek first the Kingdom of God.” “The end will be where the beginning is.” “Look at the lilies of the field.”

I recommend that you focus only on the sayings of Jesus and their meanings and forget all the surrounding embellishments, distortions, additions and deletions.

To that end, I highly recommend reading The Gospel According to Jesus by Stephen Mitchell, which will renew your faith as well as give clarity about the meanings of the teachings of Jesus, which He wanted us to discover.

For your thoughts about demons, please read how to get rid of unwanted thoughts.

All the best,

Mike Kinnaird
Habit Guide: How to be Happy & Healthy

I feel life is passing me by, and I have accomplished little, even down to the ordinary everyday things and I feel I have lost the zeal and zest out of life.

I feel that God would be saying that I need to wake up and use the life and talents He gave me, but I feel I do not have any talents either — I just drift into each new day and accomplish nothing different from week to month to year on a continuous basis.

And I just get so annoyed with myself and take it out on those of my family, which is so unfair. I have no focus, goal, challenge, as each of these require time and money to join, and be involved in activities which I cannot afford, well only very few if I push myself. I take on courses with great zeal and then after a few weeks into it, any excuse and I will lose heart in what once was something I loved.

Why does this happen me? Sometimes I think ‘What is my life about?’ Where is it all going? Will I feel like this in 10yrs time?

I’m in my early 40’s now and wish I had a dream, something of my own to attend to. I am envious of those who have the will power and motivation to change themselves.

I have all the books, on diet, food, health, positive thinking and still feel low self esteem and that people don’t find me interesting or want to become my friend — even though I have put myself out there, done the classes, am friendly, warm and kind.

But I do not tend to attract the same like minded people. I would really love to have a few good, trustworthy, loyal people in my life that I could be myself with, warts and all — and be accepted for my own personality and not compared to others which happens all the time.

I am my own worst critic of myself. I would love to hear from you about all this.

There’s a very true saying… “laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you cry alone.” People want to be around happy people because we all affect each other with our “vibe” in very powerful ways. So people want to be with people that make them FEEL GOOD.

So, as always, your desire, focus and energy should rightly be behind BEING HAPPY. What does it matter how many classes you go to, how much you desire good friends if nothing about you changes? This is about YOUR FEELINGS first and foremost. YOU have to FEEL GOOD before you can cause others to feel good. And then you’ll be very popular because you’ll be a joy to be around.

You may well have all the diet and health books sitting on your shelf but how has that translated into ACTION, consistent action — good habits.

Seriously throw all these other books away because they have achieved nothing, and read Habit Guide, which is all about action — the consistent actions, habits, that will get you to a place of feeling good IF you commit to it. I will happily answer any questions you have about putting Habit Guide into practice, but first you need to read it — it’s short — only takes about an hour to read it cover to cover. And then you’ll be in no doubt what the causes of “FEEL GOOD” are. Then you will be truly empowered because you will know the truth about happiness.

Everything spins out from HAPPY.

Get happy FIRST, then good things will happen in your life. Happy first — focus there with as much energy and focus as you can muster. Step one — read the Guide.

And Trisha, I think it’s true that what we feel the world is withholding, we should give. So you can make sure that you are a trustworthy and loyal friend to those close to you, and fully accepting of everyone as they are. If you really think about it, can you say that’s true now?

Also, look at your thinking, WHAT you are thinking and holding as truth… yes you should think positively, but only when negativity comes. Your default state should be “no-mind,” just an alert awareness of what appears in your mind. If that is negative; “My life is a mess,” “I’m useless,” “What’s wrong with me?” “Everyone hates me,” then you need to tell a new truth about these things… substitute a positive thought, or at least see they are “not true.”

Just SEEING negativity for what it is, not identifying with thoughts, takes the sting out of them. Because when you really LOOK at these thoughts, you see them for what they are.

When you’ve read Habit Guide, you’ll be very clear about what matters and so you’ll be able to use all the positive ideas in the Guide to counter negativity. “I know what matters — happiness,” “I’m getting happy first, I have direction.”

There’s nothing important that you need to achieve other than happiness — happiness is not a puffed up ego. But happiness creates ripples as you interact with life, with people, and THAT has tremendous value. Even one random act of genuine kindness can deeply affect a person so you can see, that everything you do is making ripples.

All the best,

Mike Kinnaird
Habit Guide: How to be Happy & Healthy

Smile Qigong

Qigong (pronounced “chee-gung”) is a great tool to help heal from CFS/ME.

CFS leaves you with no energy but lots of time, so qigong practice is perfect — it’s something you can do to give you more energy and works on all levels to help you heal — physically, psychologically and emotionally.

What is qigong?

Qigong means “energy cultivation” and it’s the grandfather of tai-chi. It’s a series of slow-flowing movements and stances combined with breathing techniques which if practiced often, improve energy levels, strength, posture, body awareness, relaxation and clarity of thought. Qigong brings a feeling of lightness to your body instead of the heavy feeling that’s so common with CFS/ME…

Qigong created for CFS/ME

Smile Qigong was created by Ron Prescott ND, who’s worked with many qigong masters and who cured himself of CFS/ME using qigong as one of the cornerstones of his healing system. Smile qigong was created specifically for CFS/ME and can even be done sitting down if necessary.

Smile Qigong DVD

You can now get all the wonderful benefits of qigong for CFS/ME by getting the Smile Qigong DVD and using it to practice at home. It’s now available from the Amazon UK online store and can be shipped worldwide.

All the best,

Mike Kinnaird
Habit Guide: How to be Happy & Healthy

“In Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol S Dweck PH D, she states that humans have one of two types of mindsets — a ’set’ mindset or a ‘growth’ mindset. Regardless of how intelligent people are they either give up (set mindset) when things get tough, or dig in and relish the challenge (growth mindset).

I fall into the ’set’ mindset group. The author does say you can change your mindset but I haven’t finished the book yet. Your Habit Guide is awesome, a revelation, paper gold. BUT no matter how many times I read it, I get inspired for five minutes, then I go back to my old ways and think that no-one can improve on what they are. Perhaps you could incorporate this information into a new edition of Habit Guide.”

Thanks for that Chrissy and I appreciate you taking time out to tell me about it. I read hundreds of books as I tried to piece together “what works” and looking back, none of them had much value.

What works is a few ideas PURSUED WITH DOGGED PERSISTENCE.

That takes a focus on those few ideas. You’re not the first person to read Habit Guide and then go read a stack of other books, despite the fact that they “get it” and love it when they’ve read it…

Pursuing the few ideas is hard at first, change can be hard, habits are SUBTLE and POWERFUL and people may lack awareness, and easily get sucked back into to the old way… old habits die hard.

But the solutions will always be the solutions. And for some, the journey may be long, some may need other life experiences, some may need to hit rock bottom before they’ll do what it takes.

The combination of the six elements as habits is as powerful as it gets. Each one is a powerful influencer of mood and together, they have awesome power to change your state, and give you joy for life.

But it’s very true that you can lead a horse to water but you can’t hold its head under :-)

To give you an example of what I mean… when I first started meditating, I had an experience which showed me just how out of control my mind was. Because I sat down for meditation, and 20 minutes later I remembered I was supposed to be meditating… TWENTY MINUTES. Now… does knowing about set/growth mindset help that at all?

I’ve not read the book of course, but I’m exceptionally clear about what works, and have personally coached all sorts of different personalities to the true solutions. It always works when applied, but for example, a mind that runs off for twenty minutes seriously needs meditation, not more information.

I’ll tell you that there are a lot of PhDs out there who do some research, and then rush off and write a book. Now that may all be very interesting but you have a few decades for this life. Picking up a bit here, a bit there, info that really does not make a dent, is not going to work.

I once read some AWESOME advice in a yoga book that I still have… “An ounce of practice is worth a ton of theory.” People do have this tendency to want to stay in the theory… it’s kind of entertaining, and it’s less hard work that actually doing stuff.

Truly… the solutions are incredibly SIMPLE. For example, meditation is utterly simple, there is nothing simpler, and yet at first, the unruly mind has tremendous momentum. No amount of information will do anything so solve that problem, only PRACTICE will do it. Practice, practice, practice.

You can spend your whole life studying nutrition and not get to the bottom of the complexity with which your body and food interrelate. And yet what you REALLY need to know is what to actually eat!! Does it not simply boil down to that?

So I am utterly clear about what works, and I also know how the “monkey-mind” — the mind that jumps about a lot, is EASILY distracted. My advice to you would be to not be distracted, to come back over and over to what works and apply what energy and effort and time you have, in the right direction.

That’s why I say at the end to make it a habit to read Habit Guide, because yes, the inspiration fades after a little time and we can be sucked into old ways. By reading every day you stay focused, not distracted.

It’s can be a tough journey, especially at first. The first steps are truly the hardest but as the things you do improve your clarity of mind and energy, it gets easier and easier until finally, health and happiness, joy for life are EFFORTLESS.

So again, thanks, but no thanks. My hope for you is that you commit to what works, and I will be here to answer your questions if you commit to the program and guide you through any pitfalls.

It’s like you have to get through the swamp to reach the oasis. And in the swamp, it’s dark, dank, foggy, smelly, lots of confusion, lots of stuff in there that can easily turn you from the path, trip you up, distract you. But Habit Guide shows you the clear way out of the swamp if you have FAITH, and enough focus and determination to follow the path.

I hope you do, and then you’ll experience what I promise is there — joy for life.

All the best,

Mike Kinnaird
Habit Guide: How to be Happy & Healthy

“I’m having this crazy problem. I was watching this movie [Wicked Attraction] last month [January 2012] and I saw that 2 teenagers, and 2 adults broke into the old lady’s house, and kidnapped her… Took her to the beach, and simply threw her in the ocean, then she drowned.

They said that they went to jail/kids jail, and will sent them free 2039 or something like that, and i was worried that it might happen to me too… :/ I’ve been having this thoughts for over a month now. How do I make these thoughts disappear? I tried everything, exercising, watch comedy, and lots. Nothing worked. Please Help!”

The trick is to see it all in a new light, to see the truth, to see your worry as valueless, as actually hurting you, then to remove all attention… ignore every thought about it…

Fact: there are bad people who do bad things but what is the risk? Are you in danger? The truth is that 99.999999% of people are GOOD — you aren’t in any significant danger, the truth is that you’re safe so why worry?

And with worries, the best question is “What can I DO about it?” What you can DO is to stop feeding your mind fearful imagery and ideas. What you can DO is to trust your instincts if you come across someone with a bad vibe and go in the opposite direction.

And even IF there was danger, worry beyond what you can DO, is hurting your happiness, and so the best action would still be to be fearless, to remove fear of danger. Otherwise you cause yourself constant anxiety.

“Some of the worst things in my life never happened.”

Mark Twain

This means that it’s mainly our own minds rather than reality that cause us the most pain. The “worst things” are actually IMAGINING terrible stuff happening, that’s the worst.

When you watch scary stuff, you’re telling your mind “my environment is dangerous” because these reactions in our minds developed when we lived in nature and are the perfect response to natural dangers. And so, you cause your mind to start to LOOK for danger everywhere. Can you see that? It’s cause and effect.

The News is the worst offender of all… all the world’s bad stuff beamed into every living room in the world, all having what effect? It has the effect of making us all think the world is a terrible and dangerous place when it truly is not. It triggers these natural responses in us that look for and see danger everywhere. It makes us all fearful, that’s the worst.

Be clear, that the BEST outcome for you, is that  all these thoughts ARE NOT THERE. Be clear that the only time to fear, is if danger is here NOW, and if that was ever the case, you will “fight or flight,” fight or run away, avoid, the two natural solutions to real danger now.

Clarity:

1. There’s no point worrying about things that are never going to happen.
2. Most people are good.
3. Really… I’m safe.
4. If I’m ever in danger, I will do what comes naturally… move away or if cornered, fight.
5. It’s best not to feed fear into my mind by watching scary stuff.
6. It’s best to focus on stuff that makes me feel good.
7. Ignoring unwanted thoughts makes them die-away because attention is the volume control for thoughts.

Once you’re ultra clear, ignore every occurrence of any thought about this movie — which means have a don’t care attitude and put your attention elsewhere.

And PLEASE, stop watching disturbing stuff, including news. Focus on stuff that makes you FEEL GOOD, and trust your instincts to avoid danger if it ever becomes necessary.

Mike Kinnaird
Habit Guide: How to be Happy & Healthy